It's a question that just triggered my usual rant about romantics and it's wiles. It's really getting quite old! As soon as I think something, or hear something that resounds with that part of my opinion, I feel the immediate need to get on here and bug anyone who has the bad luck of being on my page, with my two cents; before long they are 6 feet under all my loose change and I have to remind myself that no one is questioning my world view except myself.

Anyways, my horrible question was, "Why aren't I a romantic?". It almost seemed as if I had some longing to be one, but then I thought about the implications of being romantic and I grossed myself out and decided I was far more than alright with the way I am. So, in a desperate attempt to sedate the zealous opinion within, here are some reasons why I am very thankful that I am not a romantic.

- I will not fall for someone who is bad for me, a sleaze, someone who is lazy, or just about anyone else for that matter. It's a price to not let the bad in, sometimes you insist on blocking out the potential good as well.

- When I actually do have an interest in someone, I won't freak out about every little action, or word, or happening. Maybe it's because I assume that they just aren't into me, but it helps in life not to freak out about such petty nonsense.

-I won't be desperate or heartbroken when I am 30 and have no love prospects in sight. I can be more than happy and fufilled doing my work and keeping busy. Kids aren't even in my life plan, so I won't jump into anything for a reason any less than what is satisfactory to me. 

To put words to my mind, again, I can see how selfish I am and how I am setting myself up for destruction, but I will come to that bridge when I cross it, and that is not right now. If you're wondering though, I do see why I am this way, I am just in self defense mode. That would explain why I can't really start to like someone until there's a good enough chance they feel for me. I don't trust people not to harm me, so I constantly attempt to cushion my life to escape that which can be painful.

It will start with raised voices, and then the emotions will manifest in words. The words will begin with "You know what?" Like they always do. I grow weary of that phrase because it's the beginning of your every rebuttal. "You know what" will get louder and louder. Profanity slips in, usually used in a grammatically incorrect way. Lots of "fuck" and "shit", I think those are her favorite. Tears will come in here, or maybe sooner.

As soon as you drop the bomb, there isn't any logic. Logic doesn't exist in this time and space. As soon as she gets angry and it becomes an argument, reasoning loses all it's weight. What you call reason just blends into the madness of it all.

Insert tangent points, nonsense, and hurt, and you've got an argument with my mother.

The aforementioned bomb is a declarative statement, it's no longer just a possibility proposed to her.

I am moving out, and it's a huge deal. I can barely stand it.

All these preconceived ideas are screaming at me no matter where I turn. I see them in other blogs, I see them on facebook, I hear the people at school... And it's all because of a few people who came before me and really messed up and now, I'm guilty of their same sins by association.

This is just another monster born of ignorance, just like racism, sexism, and many other prejudices. In my case, however, no one is demeaning me because of my sexual orientation or political view, but because of my faith.

I AM A CHRISTIAN.

And you know what folks? It's really, really tough. Just because of the pious and hypocritical generations which preceded me, I am constantly being misunderstood. All those horrid pictures you have in your head about how bad Christians are because of people who weren't living like Christians. The anger, hatred, closed mindedness that Christians are so well known for DON'T DEFINE ME.

One of the ways I get attacked in the most, is people misunderstanding how I view homosexuality. They don't get it because the previous generations who picketed and hated gay people have left their mark of bigotry in the world's eyes. Let me tell you, I have gay friends. I don't call them fags or run from them becuase they're so bad, I love them because JESUS LOVES THEM. But you know what? I disagree with their lifestyle choices. I don't endorse gay marriage, but I also don't endorse murder, lying, fornication, cheating, or bigotry.

One of the most basic principles of Christianity is that EVERYONE'S BAD. That includes me, the most Godly people I know, and everyone else for that matter. We are born sinners. So for me to have some false sense of superiority over people who are gay is just wrong, and COMPLETELY unChristian, no matter how you spin it. The second my beliefs are used to judge anyone's life except my own, the purpose is defeated.

Another important point is that no one sin is worse than the other. To look at a thief and say, "Well at least I'm only a liar", is completely unChristian. So, in turn, to say to a gay person, "At least I have different sin than you", is also blatantly against Christian theology.

To be Christian isn't to judge anyone and everyone, to be Christian is to recognize you're absolutely no better and that we all need the grace of Jesus. To be Christian is not to hate everyone who disagrees with your faith and ostracize them, it is, rather, to love people because Jesus does and welcome them and help them because Jesus says to.

So don't label people, because chances are, you really have no clue how that person works. You've just heard a story or had this one experience (or sadly, multiple experiences) with a certain group. It still doesn't mean that everyone is like that, or that you now know it all. Realize, you could really have no clue.